It has taken me YEARS to come to terms with CHRISTMAS being a time of celebration. I miss my mom EXTRA at Christmas. On this day, 18 years ago, I said good-bye to the most important woman in my world, my beautiful mom after a battle with cancer. That was the most painful Christmas of my life as my family tried to navigate our way through the “festive joy” that was everywhere and the heart-wrenching emptiness and pain of having just watched the same person who gave me life, cross over to the other side.
Those who knew my mom, could NOT ignore her presence – she was a force of LIFE!!! She showed me by example how to be a mother. She gave us all unconditional BELIEF in ourselves to do ANYTHING we set our minds to. She was my #1 Cheerleader, Biggest Fan and the BEST listener who I could share everything with and TRUST implicitly.
Yesterday, I was on my way back from a one-night-road-trip/business meeting with my 16-year-old daughter, Madison. I was telling Madison about my mom, about how much they would have loved each other and about how very much I missed her. Sadly, my mother died before my children were born. Madison replied, “Although I never met grandma Bonnie, I feel like I know her because of all the stories you tell and the pictures I’ve seen.”
That gave me goosebumps and a huge amount of joy!!!
For those who have lost someone you love, keep them alive through the stories you share with loved ones, friends and the gratitude you send them through the distance of time and space, for all they have given you to help make you who you are.
Just this morning my brother and I were discussing the strange awkwardness that surrounds the death of a loved one. It’s as if no one wants to mention them for fear of bringing us to tears and when we speak of them there is silence in listening as if people don’t know how to respond. Only in keeping their memory alive, do they live on. If you have lost a loved one – SPEAK about them, laugh at the funny things they did or said and share them. If you are a friend of someone who has lost a loved one, INDULGE them. Ask them questions and remind them how lucky they were to have had such an incredible person in their life.
Legacy’s should not be the exclusive territory of the rich and famous, world leaders and athletes of days gone by. We are living amongst everyday heroes who influence and impact our lives today and long after they are gone.
And for those of you missing someone as we inch ever closer to Christmas, give yourself permission to smile, laugh, even cry a little bit. Celebrate your loved ones and try to find joy in the moments you share with friends and family that are with you now. Remember you are creating MOMENTS today that will last you and those whose lives you touch just by your presence, for a lifetime to come.
Sending you warmest wishes and much love for a happy holiday!!!
Thank you for being a part of this journey. Never stop believing one person can make a difference… that one person is YOU!
With love and gratitude,